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Build The Life You Want, Day By Day

How do you live your best midlife?

Day by day.

Your plans, ambitions and dreams create the framework for a life you want, but it’s the day to day habits - your routines, schedules, boundaries and priorities - that create the experiences of your life. 

If your daily behaviour isn’t taking you in the direction you want to go, it’s unlikely you’ll get there any time soon! 

Because it’s our daily habits that will either make us or break us. Yet often we...

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Your story isn’t just your past... it’s your future

 Is the story of your past serving you in the future?

Storytelling is one of the most profound traits that separate humans from other animals.  From the earliest cave drawings and pre-written word oral traditions, we have striven to contextualise our lives.

The most important story however, is the one we tell ourself. 

Words make worlds and the narrative we tell about ourselves isn’t just a story of our past, but a glory or gory arrow pointing us towards our future.

We...

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The self-care umbrella

When recently asked about my Sunday self-care routine, I explained that I’ve learned the hard way that self-care isn’t a once a week treat, but a fundamental way of living intentionally. (That’s not to say Sundays aren’t a good day to indulge more thoroughly!)

But while there’s certainly been increased discussion around the importance of self-care, with the feminist author Audre Lourde going as far as to declare that “Caring for myself is not...

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Why self-focus is a vital part of self-care

We hear a lot about the importance of self care but I feel that's actually an umbrella term for a myriad of mental, physical and emotional approaches we need be living to our full potential.  A powerful part of the process is self-focus.  It's more than taking care of yourself, but really connecting (or reconnecting)  with your values, your sense of self and what makes you tick. 

The most crucial time to do this is that busiest of times - the mayhem of...

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Building Strength and Sass in MidLife

Despite being about to discuss yoga and pilates, I'm not going to go all whispers and woo woo on you.  I'm so passionate about women finding the magic of midlife amid the often mayhem, I'm more tempted to be all yell-y and yay yay on you! 

As anyone who knows me well can testament, my mantra for anyone who wants to listen is that we should say:

Fuck it to ageing gracefully; here's to ageing powerfully!

'Midage' is being redefined (and possibly even totally reinvented). Today,...

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How to manage tough times

If it feels hard, it’s usually because it is hard

 

Think about the people you care about in your life - perhaps a partner, children, parents, close friends, even work colleagues. How do you normally respond to them when they’re struggling with one of life’s curve balls?  Do you ignore them?  Tell them to just get on with it?  Heap more pressure on them?  Tell them they’re not worthy of a hug? Call them lazy if they try to rest and reboot?

...

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Note to self: whatever happens, today is what I make it.

 In the mayhem of midlife, we often forget how much choice we have. The minute we lift our faces off the pillow, we face into a barrage of responsibility and to-do lists.  We start the day already feeling like a human doing, rather than a human being. In today’s world, we often experience the paradox of choice... our brains frazzling with dazzling arrays of possibility - from which wine to what’ll I make for dinner, from clothes in shops to chaos of deciding what to...

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It’s not lazy to do nothing; it’s love.

Do you ever find hard to relax? By relax I mean, to the point of doing nothing?  I certainly did, and now because I recognise it in myself, I have to be fairly intentional about doing it. Intentional about doing ‘doing nothing’?  Yep. And here is why.

I grew up in a family where everything was made by two very competent, creative (post-war) parents. My dad made wine, did all electrical and plumbing DIY and even built the furniture (literally. One of his many creative...

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How to ride life to your advantage

I’m not a fan of rollercoasters.  That slow crescendo to the top, that gut-out-your-mouth rapid descent, repeated several terrifying times is not how I choose to seek thrills.

My kids love them, and while I’ll gladly roll down dunes getting sand in my knickers, I can’t do a rollercoaster.  More than happy to hold bags and catch vomit.

Yet, I know from my own experience and from people I’m coaching, that many of us are experiencing that rollercoaster feeling...

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A Recovering Perfectionist’s Plan for Staying Sane

This was meant to be a Monday Mayday blog, but the sun came out and so I abandoned desk-bound jobs and adapted the priorities of my to-do list to suit my mood and the weather.

As a Recovering Perfectionist, one of the most important gifts I gave myself was that one; to become less rigid, become more adaptable, and as a result, become better at enjoying each day for what it is, not for what I think it ‘should’ be.

If you are anything like me, the Lock-down Lo-down last week gave me...

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